Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Wishful Thinking...

Sometimes I wish I had followed my childhood dreams...

then I realize I did to some extent.


Sometimes I wish I had clear skin (okay all the time)...

then I realize my face could be constantly and completely covered in zits, and it's not. so i am thankful.


Sometimes I wish I lived in a foreign country...

then i realize maybe someday I will, and I hold onto hope.


Sometimes I wish I had more confidence in my art...

then i realize i have more than i used to.


Sometimes I wish I was a better wife...

then i realize i am getting better at it everyday, it's a learning process.


Sometimes I wish I knew John Mayer...

then i realize that probably wouldn't be healthy for my marriage, and my marriage isn't worth it. but still i would be his muse for his music, and he for my photography. he would adore my red hair and ever changing eye color, he would write songs about them. i would remind him of what is real, and what is important in the world, that it's not all about fame and money, that he can be loved for who he is inside, i would understand the real him and and....whoa whoa whoa....see what i mean? TOTALLY unhealthy.


Sometimes I wish forgiveness was easy...

then i realize it probably wouldn't mean as much.


Sometimes I wish we lived back home in San Diego...

then i realize it's more exciting living somewhere new, and I like the home we have created here.


Sometimes I wish I could get a tan...

then i realize that wouldn't be very retro, and I like all things vintage. I'll keep my peaches and cream complexion, the rest of you people can enjoy premature wrinkles.


Sometimes I wish people would just call/text/stay connected/let me know they are alive...

then i realize that the best of the best still keep in touch, and i know i am loved.


Sometimes I wish that I had a baby...

then i realize we want to do so many things still that a baby would prevent us from doing, and that I would lose my figure, and my who-ha will never be the same after, and my boobs will be sucked dry.....babies will come soon enough.


Sometimes I wish we had a house...

then i realize we wouldn't have free cable anymore, or people to fix things, and we would have to pay for electric, AND water, AND garbage, and lots and lots more things. i am content.


Sometimes I wish I had the ability to go over to my parents house and visit on a regular basis and just be there to hang out, i wish i could be at taco night, and go to my brother's baseball games, i wish i could hug my dog and take him on a walk...

then i realize...i will always wish for that.

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